"The Great Sin"

An interesting thing happened the other day that made Dawn and I think. Our friends who lead homegroup are a lot of fun and are really great friends. They just aren't very practical sometimes. Often they wait until the day of homegroup to plan what we are going to do and what the meal should look like, and sometimes they don't plan it at all.

Now, Dawn and I pride ourselves heavily on being practical because that is something our parents highly value (it's all their fault!). Therefore, it is really easy for us to step in and ask questions that will lead our homegroup leaders to a decision about what we should do. We suggest ideas and try to influence the way they lead. In the process we tend to judge them, though. Then Dawn was convicted by this passage in 1 Corinthians 13. The first part is normally left out, but the second half is used in most weddings. I don't think they should leave the first part out:

If I speak in tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Dawn and I are gifted in a number of ways and we are really tempted to use them pridefully. It never occurred to me that God wouldn't want me to use my gifting if it got in the way of loving someone. In this case, that is certainly true. I've been reading Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis and chapter 8, titled "The Great Sin," is an incredible explanation of pride. Here are some of the key points:

There is one vice of which no man in the world is free; which every one in the world loathes when he sees it in someone else; and of which hardly any people, except Christians, ever imagine that they are guilty of themselves. . . the more we have it ourselves, the more we dislike it in others. . . Other vices may sometimes bring people together: you may find good fellowship and jokes and friendliness among drunken people or unchaste people. But pride always means enmity - it is enmity. . .

Now what you want to get clear is that Pride is essentially competitive--is competitive by its very nature. . . Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man. We say that people are proud of being rich, or clever, or good-looking, but they are not. They are proud of being richer, or cleverer, or better-looking than others.

He goes on to talk about how pride is often the root of all other vices, and indeed, what made the devil the devil.

I suffer from this in a big way, and I think my pride has probably taken a large part in most of the difficult relationships I've had in the past, including those in ministry. This is something that God and I will have to work on very deeply before I will ever be a leader again. I can imagine being a band director and potentially enjoying "moving them about like toy soldiers," as C.S. Lewis said. I want power, I want respect, I want people to think that I'm smart and funny, I want people recognize my gifts, but 1 Corinthians says that if I don't have love, I am nothing. And pride is the opposite of love.

As one of my favorite comedians, Robin Williams, would say, "Let's get ready to HUMBLE!" No joke, though.