An end to the search

I got a job!

I am the new Assistant Band Director for a 3A district in a town about 25 miles west of where I live. A mere 35-minute commute on a rural highway and I'm there!

My official title is 6th Grade Band Coordinator and Woodwind Specialist, though I work with all levels of students: 6th through 12 grade; beginning, middle, and high school concert and marching bands! I'm part of a three man team. The head high school director is a brass player and the other assistant director does middle school and coordinates percussion. I really like these guys and I think we will have some great chemistry when working together. I'm happy with the fact that everybody does everything - we all teach beginner classes as well as conduct ensembles.

I have to go to "work" now, meaning student teaching, so I'll update with more details when I know them! Thanks for your prayers and support this semester. My search that began in January is now over! Yay!

Manning it up' and web design

If you have not been to my website recently, I'd love for you to check it out. It is now ready for potential employers of school districts where I'm applying to see. I'd love more experience doing web design, especially flash.

Otherwise, we're doing ok. Having a hard time with the sermon preached this morning by our campus pastor. How do you get "You young men need to man up, get a job, take a wife, and start making babies" out of Jeremiah 29? Yes, I'm taking it totally out of context, but that is what the rest of the sermon was like. We felt pretty slimed.

Reflections 1/26 - 2/13

LMS Solo & Ensemble Festival 1/26

It was a very good experience learning about how these festivals are organized and done. Every student in band, grades 6-8 were required to participate (about 275 students), though many of them did not wish to and some did not show up. In general, I was impressed with how well it was organized and with the level of preparation that some students exhibited. There was an extremely high level of director control over the festival which caused a lot of stress on our part. It was decided that each student pay $7 to participate, that we know which solo each person is playing, if they have conflicts that day, that we provide their copies and accompaniment parts, as well as organize accompaniment rehearsals (for those who didn't play with a CD), and payment. We also catered in the food for the high school volunteers and judges and set everything up. This was no easy task and there was constant difficulty trying to get students to cooperate - especially the ones who didn't want to play in the first place. In general, I thought there was too much director responsibility and not enough student ownership.

LHS Symphonic Band

This class is going better. I gave them a scale test two weeks ago on a Wednesday and Friday. I did this because I wanted to hear them play individually, assign parts and chairs, and to know their scales because that is a normal part of our daily routine. They were to prepare six major scales (Bb Eb Ab F C G) in all-region audition format and I picked two for them to play individually in front of Mr. H, the head high school director, and I. They were to pick a comfortable tempo that promoted accuracy. It went badly. These were scales that they apparently should have known since 8th grade, but many of them didn't. A couple of students cried during their test and it made both of us feel uneasy. We didn't grade too low, and only a couple of students received Cs. The following Monday, I led a discussion about the importance of performing solo, learning how to deal with performance anxiety, practice techniques, and the importance of scales. This discussion lasted 25 minutes and I think it made a difference. Students argued that they should never have to perform alone and that is why they signed up for band. I did my best to give them real life examples of why they would need these skills but some weren't convinced.

I think the biggest thing that I am learning from this class is that students will always take the path of least resistance. My job as a teacher is to be the resistance. I'm finding that difficult when I am alone in a room full of people who don't believe as I do, and I realize that it takes a great deal of confidence in what I believe is right to convince them to see it my way. After all, they do not know what I know and have little ground on which to argue with me. It feels different and slightly uncomfortable to insist on what I think is right without anyone telling me to do it. I must grow up and consistently be the adult in the room.

Otherwise, I feel good about the daily routine that I have in place: Breathing (in 4 out 4, in 2 out 6, in 1 out 8); Foundations for Band (Williams & King), F long tone #1a & 1b, warm-up set 1 (options 3, 4, 5); Bb major chord articulation exercise (H); major scales (Bb Eb Ab F C G) with different rhythms; and tuning - concert A and Bb. We then have announcements in the middle of rehearsal so they are paying attention and ready to listen. There is usually 25 minutes left over for repertoire after the daily routine. I am working on getting them a march to play and will introduce two other pieces in the next couple of weeks for teaching purposes.

My rehearsal technique is generally going in the right direction. I am learning how to isolate textures and make changes, but I don't isolate things enough to understand exactly what is going wrong. Sometimes, I forget to put the isolated part back in the context of the music so that I can clearly hear the change or improvement made. I am reluctant to go back when the band does not play consistently because I do not enjoy going back for people who make mental errors because their focus is bad. This is something that I absolutely need to do, though, because otherwise I am communicating that it is ok to make mental errors and not pay attention. It is not ok. If I don't insist on this, no one will.

Lastly, I could improve the way I speak to the ensemble. I too often give directions in the form of a question: "Trumpets, could you start at 8?" instead of "Trumpets, start at 8" or "Are you playing F#?" instead of "You played F-natural. It should be F#." I also need to work on questioning them more instead of telling them. This will help them to think critically about their playing instead of relying on me to fix their errors.

Beginning Trumpet Class

This is my best-behaved, most focused class. I gave them their first test two Thursdays ago on their C and Bb scales from page 40 & 41 of Essential Elements. I am not confident that some of them understand how to practice these, though I went over it many times during class. We started pass-offs which involve each student playing through 20 different tunes from Essential Elements that they must play nearly perfectly to get credit. If they pass all 20 by the end of the semester, they get to go to Sandy Lake to perform and play in the park on May 6th. We will spend most Fridays taking time to do this, since F.M. is doing that with her beginning classes.

My issues here are three-fold: (1) I do not isolate groups or individuals enough to tell if they are understanding and playing correctly, (2) I struggle to insist that they both focus and do it right the first time, and (3) I am not patient enough to go at a slow enough tempo where everyone can play it without error.

Beginning Clarinet Class

I have the same issues teaching this class as with the trumpet class. There are a couple of special cases which I am not sure how to deal with. One student in the class has some kind of spur or wrist problem and can not hold the clarinet. Another person has no working reeds and insists that her mother does not have money to buy one. She has a major attitude problem and is probably failing many of her classes. The school has provided her with at least four reeds and she has not paid for them, but F.M. will not give her any more. These two students are friends and become very disruptive. I am struggling to give them enough to do and they often become bored and disruptive. It seems that the other teachers don't know what to do with them either. They have a deal with the directors that if they mind their own business and be quiet, they don't get in trouble. They will get by with Cs.

Anyway, I am never sure what to do with students who do not bring their instruments or books to class. I usually instruct them to follow along, fingering and singing, and let them know that their participation grade is lower as a result.

Miscellaneous

I am starting to get over the culture shock of being a teacher and being in this environment. It is tempting to get settled into a routine and stop striving to learn and try new things. I need to get more in the habit of asking for feedback from my cooperating teachers, because they almost never offer it. They tend to be very busy and overwhelmed with their jobs and I let that get in the way of getting feedback. Most of the time, I can not tell if I am doing well or badly. I tend to record the audio of many of my teaching sessions and that has been one of the only ways knowing how to improve. This is the most frustrating part about student teaching at the moment. Thanks for reading.

Reflections 1/03 - 1/25

I am in a busy season of my life again. I'm student teaching and I barely have enough time to write my required weekly reflections on it to send to my supervising professor. I think I'll start posting them here so you have at least some idea of what's going on with me. I've changed or abbreviated some names to protect the innocent.

LHS Symphonic Band

At Lake High School, the two bands meet four days per week: 3 days have 45 minute rehearsals and one day has an 1 1/2 hour rehearsal. The honor band (top group) meets 1st period and the symphonic band meets second period. I was placed in charge of this group on day 2 (Jan. 4), even though their semester would end in 2 weeks and some of the instrumentation would change. When I was placed in charge, I had no advance notice from W.H., the head director. I warmed them up and we sight read some chorales.

Since then, I have been responsible for going through the library and selecting repertoire for them, leading the rehearsals, doing the grading, organizing auditions, scale tests, and copying parts. The plan originally was for the honor band to compete at UIL and in Corpus Christi (spring band trip) and for the members of the 2nd band to simply come along, but the parents complained, so now the Symphonic Band will compete in Corpus Christi with me as their sole conductor. I feel really privilaged to get this opportunity as a student teacher.

There are a number of challenges with this group, though. First, the instrumentation is extremely unbalanced: there are 13 flutes, 12 saxophones, 1 clarinet, and 1 horn, 1 tuba and no bassoon players. Other sections have enough players, though most of these students are not on private lessons. I was told that this group was unmotivated, that they don't really care, and that I would need to keep them busy in order to avoid major behavior problems. I was told that they sounded worse than both middle school bands and that is why they would never go to contest. W mentioned that their other teachers have very low expectations of them and that many of them do nothing in class every day. It is my opinion that both directors have given up on these kids. They do not trust them with anything, it seems. This was a pretty intimidating situation to walk into.

In general, I feel prepared to lead rehearsals and did a fairly good job of planning. The first 1 1/2 hour class (3rd day total), I only had 45 minutes of rehearsal planned, but this past week I was able to fill the entire time. I selected two grade 2 pieces for them so far and we've been rehearsing them the last two weeks. I hope for them to have at least six pieces by the middle of February, though we will only compete with three. I've added a warm-up routine that includes 1 minute of breathing exercises, 3-4 minutes of exercises from Foundations for Band (Williams & King), as well as six major scales. All of the bands here are dependent on using the loud speaker metronome for almost everything, though I would like to get away from doing that as much. I find that using the metronome relieves my responsibilities quite a bit and I could see it as a way of being lazy in the future both on my part and the part of the students.

Otherwise, I have felt a bit nervous on the podium until this Friday, when I was able to relax a bit more and even smile. I often trip over myself when talking and it would help if I talked a bit more slowly and took time to think about my comments before speaking them.

LMS Beginning Trumpet & Beginning Clarinet class

By the second week, I was in charge of these classes at Lake Middle School. Trumpets meet 6th period (1:30) and Clarinets meet right after during 7th (2:19). They have just finished their Solo & Ensemble contest and will be working to finish the Essential Elements book this semester.

They have a history of being very fidgety and talkative, and asking too many irrelevant questions. I laid down my behavior policy and I think that it is going to really help them. It involves several rules, put in positive terms (do's instead of don'ts) and a list of things that will happen when they break rules. I don't think this was clear last semester and there were no direct consequences for bad behavior. This seems necessary for a class of 20-25 beginning 6th graders. Things have been better since, though some students simply do not want to be there, so they often distract others purposely by making odd noises on their instruments or by talking.

I have already given the Trumpet and Clarinet semester exams two Thursdays ago, which was difficult since I had not been with them for the Fall semester. They each had to play their solo in front of the class with the CD accompaniment and were graded based on a weighted rubric, using a sort of "tick system." F.M. (head middle school director) wanted me to grade easy, and most of them got As and some got Bs. This test was also to determine their chair order. I am definitely not comfortable with tests in front of the class or chair positions in beginner classes. These can create a very negative stigma that students may carry with them throughout their musical experience, should they continue after this year. Maybe it might help them practice, but I am not sure.

Sectionals

I have already lead four middle school sectionals and three high school sectionals. These have all been very positive experiences, and in general I felt more comfortable leading high school sectionals. This is where I feel most relaxed as a teacher. I am amazed at how easy it is to teach students who want to be in these sectionals versus the ones who do not. "He who has ears to hear, let him hear" seems an appropriate reference here.

Observation: HS Honor Band, HS Jazz Band, MS Honor Band, Beginning flute

The three ensembles mentioned above are some of the best bands at their level that I've heard. They are well-balanced and are full of dedicated, self-motivated students. The MS Honor Band is playing 10 major scales 2-3 octaves at the beginning of each rehearsal and playing some grade 4 music for UIL this semester, and already sounding good on it. I feel that I have a lot to learn from F.M. and T.F. this semester. I'm excited.

I will try to include my experience at the Lake Middle School Solo & Ensemble Festival for next week's reflection. Thanks for reading.

Recording is cool

I bought the XtremeMac Micromemo recorder for my iPod. I performed in front of the 55 clarinet students at UNT on Friday and recorded my performance for you to hear if you click this link (4.5MB). You can also right-click and click "save link as..." to download it to your computer.

The recording is of Etude No. 5 of 16 Etudes Modern by Paul Jeanjean, a French composer. This piece was a challenge for me when it came to the musical interpretation because the tempo was all very flexible and the form and phrasing was not very straight forward. I tried to pace it so that the listener didn't get bored, but so that I took enough time in moments that needed it. I hope you enjoy it.

crazy times

What a week. I was sick with a bad cold from last Thursday to this past Wednesday. I missed a day of work as well as some class in order to see a doctor on Monday. The doctor was running about 45 minutes behind schedule and in a hurry, so I never got to know exactly what was wrong with me; just that I needed antibiotics. Two of them. And a steroid. I love it when they ask, "You're not opposed to shots, are you?" Now, my answer is, "only when they make me want to vomit immediately after you give them to me and then proceed to make me feel very, very cold."

Things are happening so fast around here that I don't feel like I've had the time to process everything that I've been through or the things I'm learning. I'm dressing up on Tuesdays and Thursdays to drive fifteen minutes north to a middle school in a small town where I am playing with the 7th and 8th grade bands on a secondary instrument. Right now it's alto saxophone. I'm taking turns with my class to lead some warm-ups, teach some pep band music, teach some mini lessons, and assess their proficiency on scales (mainly C, Bb, F, and Eb as well as chromatic). Some of these kids can really play--I was impressed. Texas is amazing. Is whole other country.

My career as a music teacher is starting to become a reality and I'm feeling a bit nervous about it. I met with Dr. Ramsey who is in charge of student teaching about my placement for the spring on Wednesday. The result is that I'll probably student teach in a rural town at a high school and middle school. These schools are class 2A or 3A, though a 3A band in Texas is like a 4A or 5A band in Colorado. I asked to be placed in a smaller school because I wanted to get a better idea of what it would be like to teach band outside of Texas. I want to know what it might be like to have to do a lot of the teaching and administrative stuff by myself instead of having tons of staff and money to do things, which is typical for Texas. I'm hoping for a smaller staff so that I can have more face time with my mentor(s), too.

Ok, I started this on Friday and am just now publishing it. L8r.

Biz-ee-ness

A couple of weeks ago, I decided that my computer had too strong of a hold on me and that I should take a break from it. Since then, I have gotten extremely busy, so I haven't blogged.

I wanted to take some time to reflect on busyness. I wasn't busy all summer and now I find myself almost near the end of an extremely busy period. In the last week I worked 31 hours, been in class 19 (12 credit hours, go figure), spent at least 5 hours packing, 3 hours being stranded and replacing my car battery, and several more hours practicing, doing homework, and trying to stay involved in recovery. Tomorrow Dawn and I move into a new apartment and I'm very excited. That will take time, too.

I think the difference is that, by God's grace, I've remained more present emotionally and spiritually than in any other busy time. I've started to learn how to function without having to numb out. Pretty awesome.

Otherwise, I am starting to notice a few trends; I wonder if they'll last. First, I've discovered a new diet. It's called TBD: Too Busy Diet. Dawn made the most excellent burritos the other day and, after enjoying one, I wanted seconds. But there wasn't enough time, so I had to save it for lunch the next day. Pretty effective, if you ask me. Ahem. Secondly, I realized that it takes me often as much as double the time to do things as I think it does. Having three hours of free time seems to go by really really fast now. It seems like a lot of free time, but it just slips away from me. I wonder if this means that I'm getting older; getting more perspective. I can certainly get a lot more done with the time I have, which is a big deal for me. Shame has kept me from being very efficient in the past. Maybe I'll go into detail on that some other day.

The big news is that I had my clarinet auditions a couple of weeks ago and I made it into the University of North Texas Wind Symphony, which is the top ensemble here. Last semester I was in the Symphonic Band which is the second highest, so this is an improvement. I am really excited to play in Wind Symphony and I feel really humbled and privileged to sit next to these people, many of whom will win professional orchestra, band, teaching, and solo gigs in the next couple years. Hell, I'm just doing it for fun. I don't really have a desire to be at the top, I just want to have fun and enjoy playing clarinet. Or maybe that's just what I tell myself so that I don't feel totally intimidated when I walk into rehearsal. ;-)

Wish us luck on our move. Next time you see me, I'll be writing from another IP address!

For your entertainment

Here's what could happen if you talk on your cell phone during a classical music performance. . .

Music teacher

I'm taking a break from studying for an assignment for my online class.

I spent some time this afternoon processing with Dawn about what being a music teacher could be like. I often wonder:

• What kind of band director will I be?
  
• How will I treat the students?
• Will they think I'm funny?
  
• Will they think I am really uncool?
• Is it possible to have the kind of instrumental music program that I'm hoping for or will I lose my sense of idealism after a couple of years?
• Can I be a better band director than the one I had in high school?
• Am I going to have time for family and church activities, or will I end up working my butt off and get burned out?
• Will it take me a while to get over looking stupid in front of a crowd?
• Do I have the confidence that it takes to teach?
• Will this be a career that I stick with for decades or will I only last a couple of years? The odds are not in my favor.
• Am I organized enough to do this job or will I fumble my way through and pray that students get something out of it?

I guess mostly I'm wondering, "do I have what it takes?" I will never know until I give it a shot. Most of my friends who have been in band or know anything about music think that I would do a really great job, and I don't necessarily think they are wrong. I'm starting to become eager at the chance to get in front of a classroom and really put to work all of my ideas. I have no doubt that it is much harder than it looks and it will be a while before I'm comfortable in the role.
Here are my predictions so far:

• What kind of band director will I be? Probably a lot like my high school band director, Mr. Cruse (pictured right), but less hard-working and perfectionistic about some things. Hopefully, I'll live a more well-rounded life than he. Mr. Cruse didn't have a wife or family and often spent 60-80 hours working per week.

• How will I treat the students? I will probably treat them with lots of respect and will try never to yell, shame, or guilt them into cooperation. The worst I imagine being towards them is a little passive-aggressive and unclear about my intentions.

• Will they think I'm funny? Sometimes.

• Will they think I am really uncool? Yes, but maybe that won't matter.

• Is it possible to have the kind of instrumental music program that I'm hoping for or will I loose my sense of idealism after a couple of years? A. I'm sure its possible, but I might lose some of my idealism. But, hey, a guy's gotta have goals, yes?
  

• Can I be a better band director than the one I had in high school? I think so.
  

• Am I going to have time for family and church activities, or will I end up working my butt off and get burned out? I think both might happen sometime in my career. The danger is making teaching an idol in my life. We'll have to see about this one.
  

• Will it take me a while to get over looking stupid in front of a crowd? Most definitely, but its good for me.

• Do I have the confidence that it takes to teach? Yes, I have a great education and lots of support.
  

• Will this be a career that I stick with for decades or will I only last a couple of years? The odds are not in my favor. I think that if the organization and time factors don't overwhelm me in the first couple of years, than I can imagine sticking with it for a long time.
  

• Am I organized enough to do this job or will I fumble my way through and pray that students get something out of it? Not sure.
  

I know God's got things under control in this area. The prospect of being a teacher is becoming more and more real, however, so my need to trust him is also more real these days. Thanks for reading. Time to go back to working on my assignment.

Literacy in music class?

I don't have time to write this morning because I have an assignment due today by midnight for my Content Area Reading online course. I thought it might be fun to post my prereading activity, for your enjoyment (or not). Please feel free to comment. My question to you is this: do any of these activities sound like they could actually be applied in the classroom?

PREREADING ACTIVITY

Before you read, write down 3 to 5 ways you can activate and assess the degree and accuracy of your students' prior knowledge on a topic specific to your discipline. Email the topic and the suggestions to your instructor.

1. As an introduction to a general music course: Consider this quote displayed on the wall of a prominent German opera house:

Bach gave us God's word.
Mozart gave us God's laughter.
Beethoven gave us God's fire.
God gave us music so that we might pray without words.

Give examples from what you already know about these composers for how these descriptions are accurate and why.

Example: Bach and God's word:

Low level of appreciation might be that Bach used text in his music that was taken from the bible.

Medium level of appreciation might be that Bach composed church masses, oratorios, and sacred cantatas.

High appreciation level would substantiate specifics such as how Bach wrote 300 cantatas containing Biblical text (in the vernacular) while in Leipzig, Germany, three masses, and two passion-oratorios which were similar to Italian opera, but with sacred text as the subject instead of secular.

2. In a concert band rehearsal after sight-reading a programmatic piece: This piece of music is programmatic, meaning that it was composed to illustrate, in musical terms, a specific storyline. Before I read the story to you, write down some ideas you have for what this story is about. Be specific; include measure numbers to correspond with your events.

Low level of appreciation for the piece might include a general description of the character of the piece and the mood with an event or two.

Medium level of appreciation for the piece could include more specific characters and situations, linking them to each section in the music, perhaps drawing a connection to real-life experiences or other literature of the time.

High level of appreciation for the piece would demonstrate a summary of the actual storyline for which the piece was composed and any other literary devices, the piece's general form, and some background knowledge of the composer.

3. Again in a concert band rehearsal, when learning a piece by Dimitri Shostakovich: Write down everything you already know about this composer. If you have no prior knowledge, feel free to speculate based on they way this piece sounds to you.

Low level of appreciation might include knowledge that Shostakovich was a twentieth-century, Russian composer.

Medium level of appreciation for Shostakovich might be that he wrote operas, symphonies (11), band repertoire, that he was born in 1906 and died in 1975, and that the general character of his pieces ranges from very cold and dark to funny and sarcastic.

High level of appreciation would be able to name several of his works and know a lot of biographical information such as his experience under Stalin and the Soviet regime in Russia and how it stifled Shostakovich's artistry because they forced him to write patriotic pieces under the threat of death.

"Praise and Worship"

I've been very distracted during worship at The Village. I'm not sure if its me or them. It's probably me. Let me take you through what I'm thinking when standing there:

OK, first song. I can't get over how young the worship pastor looks. I know he's 28, but he could pass for 19. Interesting: he had the female vocalist sing this verse. It is in the same octave but for some reason it sounds higher. Funny how most of the men drop out when a woman leads. I bet it's because of of the timbre difference. That is probably why Castrotti were used in Italian opera so much in the late 17th century... Wow, this is way out of my singing range. Its too low if I take it down an octave, so let's try harmony. OK, that's not cool - the female vocalist is singing my tenor part, but up an octave. Now what should I sing? Clearly the text was never meant for this rhythm and chord setting. I have a degree in music, and I'm finding it hard to follow this guy. Looking around, there are several people who aren't singing and haven't sung the whole time, including the people behind me. I wonder why? Is it because they haven't been exposed to music growing up? Do they not know the words?

Maybe they don't like singing, so this part of the service is totally superfluous to them. Maybe they find that to be a very difficult venue to experience God. I mean, it isn't exactly a meditative environment. I can't help but wonder: what must it be like for someone who has never sung much in his life and never been to church to attend one of these services for the first time? Or even for the twentieth? It probably feels alien to them.

Plus, I am often singing words my heart does not necessarily agree with. I end up making a lot of lofty claims and promises about my desires for God that may just be a pack of lies. I guess my point is that sometimes it is hard to be honest with God in worship. I wish we would sing songs that had simple but pleasing melodies that were in a decent range with easy rhythms that weren't too syncopated. I wish we could sing songs with words that were not so extreme but simply spoke out of a heart that wants to experience God's love and peace and forgiveness. As I remember back on the most popular choruses in contemporary Christian worship, they were the most simple ones. They maybe had three to five words and were easy to harmonize.

Sometimes I wish that I could switch off my four semesters of aural skills training and my two semesters of theoretical part-writing and harmonization training. I wish I could stop evaluating musical performances and compositions and get to experience God more. I've felt the closest to God in the past through musical experiences I've had, so its tough when that is no longer happening.

Football field as stage

This morning I'm eating my imitation marshmallow cereal, creating Drum and Bugle Corps DVDs to save disc space, and thinking about past experiences in ministry. More about the ministry experience in a separate post, I'm thinking.

I think I should come out and admit that I am a bit of a Drum Corps addict. Ever since I saw my first show at Mile High Stadium in the summer of 2000, I was hooked. A Drum and Bugle Corps is very similar to a marching band, but there are several differences. There are no woodwinds (flutes, clarinets, saxophones) and no trombones, the corps is limited to something like 124 total participants under the age of 21, including usually 64-72 brass players, 14 marching percussionists, 12 pit percussionists, and the rest as color guard (flag, rifle and saber twirlers). A drum corps does not serve any athletics like football or basketball and is not affiliated with a school - they are independent and parent-booster supported.

In fact, Drum Corps are an athletic sport of its own: its season takes place in the summer time where, following almost a month's worth of all-day rehearsals, they tour all around the country and the world competing at football stadiums. The average drum corps will perform 25-35 shows during the summer. Being a clarinetist, I never felt it would be a good idea to play brass all summer, so I never participated. I regret that decision to this day. As a band-director-to-be it would have been a great experience for me.

Hymn

I was just listening to Minnesota Public Radio and heard a piece by Alan Hovhaness (1911-2000) who I later found out was a little-known American composer whose influences include Ralph Vaughan-Williams and eastern music as well. He was actually quite prolific - he wrote 67 symphonies and in all over 400 works. I'm sad that I haven't heard of him until now. This video depicts celestial bodies spinning to Hovhaness' String Quartet No. 2, Mvt. III: Hymn. This music gives me chills. If you like this, get a copy of Hovhaness' Symphony No. 2: "Mysterious Mountain." Now that piece is cool.

Addicted to media

Did you know that you can embed all of your favorite videos on your blog? This is too exciting.

Music and God

I believe in Jesus
I believe He is the Son of God
I believe He died and rose again
I believe He paid for us all

And I believe He's here now
Standing in our midst
Here with the power to heal now
And the grace to forgive

This song was published in 1987 by Mercy Publishing, who published most of the worship songs that I grew up on. I woke up this morning with it in my head. In fact, I often wake up with certain worship songs going through my head, and there is really no reason why. I haven't heard this song is years and years.

Maybe it is God's way of speaking to me in the morning; his way of giving me a chance to spend time with him and to remember him. I'm convinced that my best avenue of communing with God is through music. As my clarinet teacher, Daryl Coad, said, "As much as I like Christian worship music, nothing speaks to me about God more than a good Mozart or Brahms symphony."

I agree with Mr. Coad. Playing great repertoire on the clarinet that God provided using the talent that he gave feels pretty great. I often feel most at peace when in rehearsal or while practicing or when listening to classical music. All of the stress of theology and the worry about my struggles and my lack of desire and faith towards God melts away when I get to experience him through music. That gives me a lot of hope that I'm in the right profession.

You gotta see this

If you're like me, you're sitting at home at the computer thinking to yourself, "It is so hard to find good jazz bassoon music these days." Well, guess what!?! I found some. This is most of the bassoon studio at CU-Boulder playing a student arrangement of Cold Duck Time. It is not only really fun, but there are some comedic parts in there too. Click the picture and enjoy!

Darrelpalooza

My friend Darrel found out last May that he has Hodgkins Disease, a type of limpthoma cancer. Darrel and I went to high school and college together and have been good friends since our senior year in high school. He is a bassoonist and we have played in numerous ensembles, been to many parties, gone hiking, backpacking, and have traveled together. He's been a major influence in my life and although it has been hard to keep up with him since I moved to Texas, I wouldn't be suprised if we end up as life-long friends.

This picture was taken just after our graduation two weeks before he was diagnosed with Hodgkins Desease. He has been through four major chemotherapy sessions (6 weeks each) and lots of radiation. In January he found out that he had a malignant nodal relapse and would probably need a bone marrow transplant. His insurance only covers part of this operation.

Yesterday I found out that the CU Bassoon Quartet is going to have a benefit concert for him to raise money to pay for the operation. This quartet is made up of his friends in the bassoon studio at the University of Colorado-Boulder. They have some really great publicity and apparently hung their posters all over the city of Boulder. I am excited to see how the community responds, and certainly all of Darrel's friends. I believe there is a way to donate if you go to the website, so check it out.

Update

I have about 55 minutes before symphonic band rehearsal, so I thought now would be a good time to write. I'm sitting in the computer lab at the college of music. It is an extremely nice lab with very good computers, both PCs and Macs. Each computer station (total of about 50) has some really nice stereo headphones and an electronic piano for any music student with an ID to use.

To the left is part of my most recent homework assignment. Each measure is a list of notes which may be played using the fingering (valve or slide position) noted at the bottom. It is for brass methods: a class where I learn how to play (and teach) trumpet, horn, trombone, euphonium, and tuba at the rate of two instruments per semester. I have to learn virtually all of the instruments as a music education major. This semester I am working on horn, snare drum and cello. I hope to learn tuba, xylophone, and double bass this semester as well.

I am working on a really fun Spanish piece for clarinet called Hommage a M. de Falla by Bela Kovacs (pronounced koh-vahch) as well as the Clarinet Quintet by Mozart for Clarinet in A and string quartet. I'm not sure if I'll try to find a quartet to play with me or not, but it could be fun. I hope to give a solo recital in the fall. It is interesting that I love clarinet now more than ever now that it is not my primary focus; now that it doesn't really matter compared to my work in the field of music education.

Otherwise, Dawn and I are doing well. We celebrated 6 months of marriage a couple of weeks ago by eating dinner at Bennigan's and going to a Dallas Symphony concert. The traffic was terrible and it took us one hour to drive four miles, but Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No. 2 was amazing. The hall was a bit hot and the seats were tight so I suppose I prefer the Fort Worth Symphony to the Dallas Symphony.

We are having more fun together and are getting to spend more and more time with our new friends. I got to drive out with two other men from homegroup this weekend to go boar hunting. We didn't really see any boars but I did get to shoot a rifle. I enjoyed the great exercise and the camper we stayed in was really comfortable. Our wives had a sleep over and had a lot of fun as well.

Usually I try to be more philosophical or try to tell just one story instead of many. I don't plan to get in the habit of writing about everyday life like this, so this is an exception. I am sometimes annoyed by people who do that exclusively. What kind of blog writing are you most drawn to?

A sense of wonder

Tonight I attended a concert called "Premieres and Classics" featuring David Korevaar, Professor of Piano here at the university.

I am having trouble finding words for how this performance made me feel. I can only think of a few. Sublime. Magical. Wonderful. And when I say wonderful, I mean that it filled me with wonder. I sat there in my chair, squinted my eyes, shook my head, and tried to control the chills that went down my back and legs. I thought, "How could music that is this beautiful and amazing possibly exist? How can a man sit in front of 450 people and play over an hour of the most difficult music I've ever heard from memory?"

This feeling of wonder can only be compared to looking up at the stars at night away from city lights. It penetrates me the way the gaze of the girl I love does. I feel exposed and undressed. But never more real, more myself. It is impossible for me to walk away from a performance like tonight's without living more in my heart.

Tonight is not the first time I've felt this sense of wonder. No, the first time I remember feeling this is back in the days when I believed in Santa Claus. But enough about yesterday. No, really - the thought of a man who travels around the world in one night, giving out endless amounts of presents, who knows all of my actions (naughty or nice) but is still the most warm, joyful person I can imagine filled me with wonder.

As I thought about this, I realized that this sense of wonder has helped shape my concept of the supernatural. I found myself asking some of the same questions about God. I mean, if the stars are so great, how much greater is my God? If I consider the music I heard tonight to be the definition of beauty, then how much more beautiful is Yahweh? He is infinitely greater and more beautiful. Blows my hair back is what it does. And I realize that's saying a lot. (That's funny right there, I don't care who ya are)

Anyway, if you get the chance, listen to Le Tombeau de Couperin by Maurice Ravel. You can get either the solo piano version or the full orchestral arrangement - they are both performed about as often. Try to eliminate distractions, and use headphones unless you have an amazing surround sound speaker system. See if the music inspires your creativity. See if it penetrates you.

A song I grew up on

I grew up in a house which was filled with music. My dad has been a guitarist for longer than I've lived, and he's probably lead worship more times than I could imagine. I have really fond memories falling asleep to contemporary worship songs with amazingly intimate, poetic, and deeply expressive lyrics. This is a song I've been thinking about recently, and it's probably one of my all-time favorites:

In the stillness of this hour
I worship you my Lord
Crying holy is the Lord on high

In the quiet of my heart
I sing this song of praise
Crying holy is the Lord on high

And for all my days
I will bow down before you
Giving glory and honor
To your name
And for all of my life
I will worship and adore you
Crying holy is the Lord on high.

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Lord, make my hour still and my heart quiet. Let me find you there.