Video games

In reference to last night's post, the reason I was so amazed at Microsoft's achievement is that I used to be quite addicted to video games. Or more specifically, computer games. I started playing computer games at a young age on my dad's computer. I started out with a turned-based StarTrek game, followed by Tetris, Wings of Fury, and Commander Keen. Somewhere in there I played Sonic the Hedgehog on a Sega Game Gear, but the game that I was most addicted to for a long time was SimCity 2000. Then it was SimTower, SimFarm, SimCity 3000, etc. etc. There were many more games I played for hours and hours per day.

In 2005, I spent the entire summer working 14 hours per week for the residence halls at college and playing computer games for nearly the rest of it. I played Freelancer and EVE Online 5-9 hours per day. These games were science fiction based, MMORPG space simulators. MMORPG stands for Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game. I played online with thousands of other players from all over the world, where I could chat with them and create my own complex reality inside the game.

None of it amounted to anything but some entertainment that helped pass the time. I remember sitting in that chair for hours being completely numbed and absorbed in the gaming experience. When I finally quit out of a game, my mind was totally numb and all desire had left me. I didn't feel like talking to others, eating, or using the bathroom, and much less like practicing my clarinet, cleaning my room, or doing anything constructive.

I kicked my addiction when Dawn and I got engaged in April 2006 . I am still tempted to fall back into that lifestyle, but there are too many things that matter to me more than games, especially Dawn. As amazing, interesting, and complex of a reality that computer games can offer, they will never be as real or fulfilling as the one God created for me. It was much harder to pursue that reality when computer games had created a conflicting one.

My advice to addicted gainers? Get out. Go cold turkey. Try to fill the void with something constructive and creative. Try to pick up on relationships that have gone out of contact. Start a blog, take up a cheap hobby, read, do something that will not numb your mind. Are some types of games better than others? Yes. Really simple, winnable single-player games and multiplayer games that depend on lots of player chatting are better than drawn-out, single player games. Even though contact with other players is good, the relationship established by this is still extremely superficial. They can not satisfy as well as real-life relationships can.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Networking

Today I watched the keynote address webcast from the 2007 International Consumer Electronic Show (CES) that occurred on January 7 in Las Vegas. The speaker? None other than Mr. Bill Gates. He demonstrated the new Microsoft Windows Vista (computer operating system) among other new technologies they were developing as part of their "new generation of connected experiences." I was interested to find that, among other goals, Vista is designed to help people get connected to one another better. It seemed so noble, until just a few short minutes later when they announced with pride that gamers world-wide had played 4 billion hours of Xbox Live since its release in 2002.

It seems to me that they are creating their own supply and demand, the thing every good monopoly should do. They provide more entertainment than is ever needed in a day, creating temptation to neglect relationships, optimize efficiency and productivity in the workplace, and justify it by providing the illusion of stronger connectedness. Ooo, they're good.

Of course, I wouldn't fall for such temptations. Nooooo... If you feel like getting me a belated birthday present, there's still time! Windows Vista comes out January 30th.

Small town living

I've been thinking lately that I would love to try living in a small town some day. By small town, I mean a town with only one or two commercial centers, grocery stores, high schools, a hand full of churches, and only one of any particular restaurant or store.

I suppose I want to live in a small town because I am tired of going to the same stores or restaurants every week and never seeing a familiar face. I'm tried of sitting behind a long line of cars on a congested street that is slowly being widened, though years too late. I'm tired of having to drive like I'm in a hurry, just because every one else is. I feel that I have to compete with them so I don't get taken advantage of.

I'm mostly tired of the lack of community and the depersonalization of our culture. I want to live in an area where community happens naturally and where I can't ignore the people I see every day, and they can't ignore me. I don't want to have friends at work who are different from friends at school who are different from friends at church who are different from friends by my home, with none of these people knowing one another.

Maybe I just miss the familiarity of Colorado and the people I know there. The metroplex still feels huge, even after five months.

On blogging

Well, I'm back, with the goal of writing 7 days in a row, Monday through Sunday. My classes don't start until next Monday and I'm only taking 9 credit hours. Only two of those classes will require much effort outside of class. Because of this, I hope to get comfortable with writing regularly.

Blogging has been very difficult for me to keep up, and I have three theories of why this might be:

1. I think that instead of having a lack of topics to discuss, I really have an excess. My problem is that I think too fast about too many things at a time, so I have trouble focusing and making priorities in my mind. When I start on one topic, one-hundred others come to mind.

2. I have a slight perfectionist complex when it comes to writing. I don't want to write anything unless it can stand alone and be infallible. Most of the writing I learned to do in school was rhetorical, so I suppose this makes sense. I often feel I have to make a logical argument for why you should believe me, as though you wouldn't simply value my personal experience and not judge it.

3. I am a verbal processor. If there are experiences in my life or things that I am thinking, I prefer to discuss it with someone I'm close to. If it is important enough, I would just call you up and talk to you about it. You'll respond instantly that way and I usually can make more sense of the situation with your feedback. Since I expect only people who know me in person to read this blog, why should I waste time writing?

Now here are some observations in response:

1. Having too many things to write about is a good thing. I'll start writing them down and saving them for later. All I needed before was time, and I expect to have that this semester for the first time in a long time. Priorities don't matter - I'll talk about anything I want, any time I want. It won't matter to you, the reader, you just care that I write. I mean, c'mon. Its my blog.

2. It is not going to be perfect. You won't always be impressed with my writing, but your standards are pretty low at this point. You're thinking, "Something is better than nothing," right? I can talk about the reality that I live in and I don't have to back up all of my theories. You're not here to judge me.

3. Writing my thoughts down is much better for you because you can read them on your own time, at your own pace. I can still process my thoughts by getting them outside, and you might even leave comments other than, "We miss you!" "Thanks for writing!" "Very interesting post!" and "Good for you, Justin!"

Finally, it is important to try to live in my heart again, now that I have some free time. Thanks for reading. Wish me luck this week, and I'll see you tomorrow.