A sense of wonder

Tonight I attended a concert called "Premieres and Classics" featuring David Korevaar, Professor of Piano here at the university.

I am having trouble finding words for how this performance made me feel. I can only think of a few. Sublime. Magical. Wonderful. And when I say wonderful, I mean that it filled me with wonder. I sat there in my chair, squinted my eyes, shook my head, and tried to control the chills that went down my back and legs. I thought, "How could music that is this beautiful and amazing possibly exist? How can a man sit in front of 450 people and play over an hour of the most difficult music I've ever heard from memory?"

This feeling of wonder can only be compared to looking up at the stars at night away from city lights. It penetrates me the way the gaze of the girl I love does. I feel exposed and undressed. But never more real, more myself. It is impossible for me to walk away from a performance like tonight's without living more in my heart.

Tonight is not the first time I've felt this sense of wonder. No, the first time I remember feeling this is back in the days when I believed in Santa Claus. But enough about yesterday. No, really - the thought of a man who travels around the world in one night, giving out endless amounts of presents, who knows all of my actions (naughty or nice) but is still the most warm, joyful person I can imagine filled me with wonder.

As I thought about this, I realized that this sense of wonder has helped shape my concept of the supernatural. I found myself asking some of the same questions about God. I mean, if the stars are so great, how much greater is my God? If I consider the music I heard tonight to be the definition of beauty, then how much more beautiful is Yahweh? He is infinitely greater and more beautiful. Blows my hair back is what it does. And I realize that's saying a lot. (That's funny right there, I don't care who ya are)

Anyway, if you get the chance, listen to Le Tombeau de Couperin by Maurice Ravel. You can get either the solo piano version or the full orchestral arrangement - they are both performed about as often. Try to eliminate distractions, and use headphones unless you have an amazing surround sound speaker system. See if the music inspires your creativity. See if it penetrates you.